Self Confidence among SLHS students


Danielle Luft

Danielle Luft shows her self-confidence by taking selfies.

Alexandra Pawlitz, Editor

You are laying in your bed at night thinking of what you could do to possibly pass the time. Suddenly, you think of doing a self-care night and gathering all the materials in your house that could contribute to it. You grab your skin-care, your nail polish, your hair products, your face masks, etc. Once you finish up using all your products, you feel more confident. After that night, you realize that you need to spend more nights involving self-care. 

Self-confidence is hard to come by. Many people struggle to gain self-confidence and find it later on when they least expect it. For women, it’s typically harder to gain self-confidence and the lack of self-esteem can contribute to this struggle. 

According to the studies found by The American Psychological Association, “The researchers compared self-reported selfesteem, gender and age across the 48 nations in their study. In general, the researchers found that selfesteem tended to increase with age, from adolescence to adulthood, and that men at every age tended to have higher levels of selfesteem than women worldwide.”

When looking at these studies, it appears that men tend to have higher levels of self-esteem. Due to the high levels of self-esteem in men, it is more likely that men will gain self-confidence faster than women will. Women have a tendency to lower their self-esteem whenever life gets in the way of their happiness. For example, let’s say that a woman is involved in a toxic relationship with a friend. This friend tells her that she isn’t beautiful and that she doesn’t deserve to be loved. From this incident, the woman lacks self-confidence because she suddenly feels like what her friend told her is true. 

Many incidents like the example above happen all the time in the world. Women tend to get their self-confidence levels lowered when things happen in their everyday life. If a woman isn’t strong enough to overcome the difficulties that life brings along, then the ability to gain self-esteem will be harder to achieve. 

There are some common self-confidence boosters that many women can abide by, but they don’t always work for everyone since everyone is different in their own way. Makeup is a great self-confidence booster since you can cover up your insecurities with products that can be bought online or in stores. By covering up imperfections such as acne or dark spots, it can give women a confidence boost since they no longer have to worry about people judging them based on their facial features. When women apply makeup, they’re also adding pops of color to their face based off of eye shadow. Even the slightest pop of color to one’s face can benefit the self-confidence of a woman. 

Danielle Luft mentioned, “Whenever I put makeup on, my self-confidence boosts a ton because I suddenly feel like a new person. It gives me a boost in confidence and makes me feel good about myself. I don’t necessarily think I need makeup to feel beautiful, but it sure does help with my self-esteem.”

Chloe’ Baxter added, “In order to boost my confidence, I like to do my hair and makeup and get dressed up even if I’ve got nowhere to go. It makes me feel confident with myself, and I enjoy adding a pop of color to my everyday lifestyle.”

Throughout high school, many teenage girls find themselves and gain self-confidence through various ways. Some girls realize over time that loving yourself is a key to success when it comes to your self-esteem. 

Delainee Zacharko included, “I am happy with myself. I have self-love because I’ve managed to realize that if you don’t love yourself, who will? I love myself because I am me, and I can’t change that.”

Being yourself and accepting the fact that you can’t change yourself is one of the key factors to having self-confidence. Once women realize their true value and accept themselves, they are more likely to have self-confidence in their lifestyle. 

Willow Fuentes added, “I’m very happy with myself. I have a lot of self-love and I managed to gain my self-love by not caring about what anyone has to say about what I say or do.” Fuentes cares about her well being and loves herself for who she is. She adds, “I dress for myself, and I do everything for myself. Everything about me makes me love myself. I believe that I have a lot to offer, and that I am a strong, independent woman who can do anything that I put my mind to.”

Saying you’re self-confident isn’t an easy task. It takes a lot of hard work and dedication to be able to love yourself. It won’t happen overnight. For some women, it takes years to be able to fully say they are happy with who they are. 

Mikaila Borie mentioned, “Gaining self-love isn’t easy, but always working your hardest and recognizing when you are doing your best is key to loving who you are. I work to make me love myself by doing things that make me proud. I also work towards my personal goals whether that deals with how I look and present myself or things like my work ethic and productivity. Loving yourself can be difficult for some, but changing your mindset and doing things to make yourself proud are what help me most.”

Some of the main benefits of having self-confidence benefits relationships. One of the main traits that men see attractive in women is their self-confidence. Being self-confident shows a lot about your personality and who you truly are. According to Joann Cohen, “They have confidence – not arrogance. They’ve learned to be comfortable in their own skin. They own their weaknesses and are willing to work on them, but also acknowledge their strengths and are proud of them. Security like that allows women to be confident not only in who they are, but in their relationships.”

Men often find self-confidence attractive in women because they realize the woman has become comfortable in her own skin and accepted who she is. Relationships are based on personalities of both people and by having self-confidence in the beginning of a relationship, impacts how a partner might see his or her significant other. 

Self-confidence impacts relationships more than people know. Research has shown that self-esteem influences your relationship satisfaction as well as your partner’s. Self-defeating thoughts and insecurities can affect the way you act with your partner. Low self-esteem can distort your perception of your partner, according to the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology.

One of the main factors that has contributed to my self-confidence is having clear skin. I’ve dealt with acne for about six years and tried every product on the market to help clear it up. While in quarantine, I’ve had a lot of time to try new products and finally found a routine that has helped with it. My self-confidence has boosted so much after being able to finally say I have clear skin. It may have taken years to be able to say that I finally have self-love, but better late than never. I’m so happy with myself and how far I’ve come in my journey.

Overall, self-confidence takes time to develop in a person’s mindset, but with proper dedication and hard work, it can definitely be achieved. Self-love is important in so many ways and by learning to love yourself, it will not only benefit your self-esteem, but will also benefit your overall lifestyle and the choices you make within it.